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Once you have a road map of a partner that makes you happy, give attraction and chemistry a chance to develop, even if it takes five or more dates to figure it out.

After you feel the chemistry, look carefully for the “interior” traits that count, like kindness, reliability, consistency, honesty and intelligence first. Is this person willing to accept you, your complexities, maybe your children? Are you on the same page with regards to finances, parenting, living situations, marriage or more kids?

Dating from a place of anger doesn’t usually lead to good choices.

Don’t skip the counseling sessions — they will help tremendously down the road. We do what is comfortable instead of what is right.

Are you aware of your role in the marriage’s demise?

And, have you made as much peace as possible with your ex and the divorce?

Divorce is one of the most traumatic events we go through, and when we reach the proverbial "light at the end of the tunnel," many of us feel that little spring in our step and start to think about dating again.

So how can you start off on the right foot when you're just beginning to dip your toes back into the dating pool?

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Have a good vetting process and keep the pipeline filled.Beware of going out five times in a week with someone you just met!One date per week within a few weeks turns into two dates per week, and then three dates per week. The only way another person will change is if he/she wants to change himself. As much as you’d like it to be super efficient and speedy, it’s usually not, nor should it be. Sex can be great but, had too early, can cause the demise of a relationship as we are caught in a fog of oxytocin, estrogen, testosterone and dopamine.Sure, there are a few couples that had sex early on and it turned into a happy marriage, but those are pretty few and far between.

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